


beautiful feeling

by new_world



Category: VICTON (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, GOD that meme is so overdone im sorry, Kinda?, Love songs, M/M, also chan shows up bc he is wonderful and a great friend, and they were roomates, i am so bad at tags im sorry, just cute and sappy bc thats who i am, sejun baby too subin said so, subin kinda oblivious but we love him anyway bc thats our baby everyone, sujun rise 2k20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:42:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22607962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/new_world/pseuds/new_world
Summary: Subin borrows Sejun's hoodie and finds an iPod with a playlist of love songs titled Subinie.
Relationships: Im Sejun/Jung Subin
Comments: 10
Kudos: 138





	beautiful feeling

**Author's Note:**

> hellooo this is my first time writing in months and first time writing for victon so um... :) i wanted to write a fic awhile ago but had no motivation but subins menpa on twitter yesterday fueled my sujun agenda so now this happened. hope u enjoy pls be kind i cant handle criticism <3 also shoutout to my bff arina for listening to me vaguely talk about this while writing it <3 love u

Mornings in Subin and Sejun’s shared dorm were nothing short of chaotic. From waking up late and deciding to skip class to remembering ten minutes later that attendance is a grade and then bolting out of bed. Bonus chaos points for Subin losing his favorite hoodie and it being slightly too cold outside to go out without one. Subin wondered what compelled him to take an 8 am class. He’ll never know.

“Have you seen my hoodie?” Subin asked Sejun, who somehow woke up during his Great Hoodie Search.

“Subin, you have a million hoodies you need to be more specific” Sejun said from his bed across the dorm, still at least partially asleep.

“The one I always wear,” He said still looking in his closet. “I can’t find it and I need something to go outside in”

Maybe it was in his giant laundry pile. It was probably in his giant laundry pile.

“Here,” Sejun said getting up from his bed. “Just take mine” He handed Subin a grey hoodie that had been sitting on his chair.

“Oh” Subin said looking at the grey hoodie in his hands. “Thank you”

Subin glanced at the time and realized he was about two minutes past being able to get to his class on time, so he quickly put the hoodie on and left. Sejun was already on his way to going back to sleep as he left.

* * *

Wearing something of Sejun’s wasn’t exactly a new thing for Subin. They shared clothes several times in the past year or so they had been roommates. But something felt different this time. Maybe it was because the hoodie was so Sejun, since he wore it all the time. The hoodie had the perfect fit that old, but not too old, hoodies had, and it smelled like Sejun. And yes, Subin knew what the other smelled like from frequent cuddle sessions. It just felt like Sejun was with him, which was always comforting.

Sometime on his walk to class Subin noticed something in the hoodie’s pocket. He tried to ignore it, because it was Sejun’s. So really it was none of his business what the other kept in his hoodie pockets and didn’t take out before letting someone borrow it.

Eventually his curiosity got the best of him so he had to see what it was. The mysterious item ended up being an iPod nano. The sight of it made Subin laugh because of course that is something Sejun would own. He didn’t even know Apple made them anymore or that anyone under the age of 50 would own one. But Sejun was Sejun, and this was just another small thing about him that was endearing to Subin.

As he sat down in class, he decided to take a look through the music that Sejun downloaded. He wanted to see if there was anything embarrassing that he could tease the other for later. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary: just some idol songs and some English songs, some of which Subin knew and some he didn’t.

He looked through playlists next, because Sejun’s iPod nano was more interesting than the current lesson happening in his gen ed science class. Actually, anything about Sejun was more interesting than the current lesson happening in his gen ed science class. The playlists seemed normal. Nothing out of the ordinary just Untitled playlists that either had one song or none, workout playlists, study playlists, etc. It was all just normal. Until…

Until he got to the playlist titled _Subinie_.

His first thought was that it was a playlist of song recommendations, since they both loved music and frequently shared new music they found. He figured Sejun would share the playlist with him eventually, but he was curious now. So, he decided to put in his airpods and listened to it, his class had nothing on the mystery that was Sejun’s playlist.

The first song was U You by Apink.

_My love is U U_  
_When I see you, I keep getting nervous_  
_My everything is U U_  
_I can only see you in my eyes_  
_In my dreams it’s U U U (baby my love)_  
_Everyday, it’s U U U (i just wanna)_  
_Little by little, slowly, I want to fall into your love_

Subin didn’t understand why Sejun would have this song on a playlist for him, especially if it was songs the other was recommending for him. He already knew this song, and Sejun knew that… so why was it there?

He went to the next song, Just One Day by BTS.

_If I can be with you for just a day_  
_If I can hold your hands for just a day_  
_If I can be with you for just a day_  
_Just one day_  
_If you and I can be together for just a day_

Again Subin was confused why Sejun would have this on a playlist for him, he knew the song it was one of his favorites by BTS. Sejun knew that, Sejun knew basically everything about him.

He went to the next, Been Through by Exo.

_You shine like the stars_  
_You light up my heart_  
_At the end of today’s hardships_  
_Brightly shine on me_

This one made a little bit of sense. Subin knew the song, but wasn’t as familiar with it as the other two. Maybe Sejun just really liked the song and wanted Subin to hear it. But that didn’t make much sense since Subin had never heard him listen to it.

He skimmed through some more of the songs on the playlist: Chungha’s Cherry Kisses, Day6’s Beautiful Feeling, Loona’s Heart Attack, and even more songs about love. All songs that Subin knew. He couldn’t figure out why Sejun had this playlist and why it was titled with his name. There was one answer that anyone else would think was the obvious answer: that Sejun loved with him or had some type of crush on him. But he didn't. He couldn’t, it just didn't make sense. Subin would never believe that, even if the thought gave him a feeling in his chest he couldn’t exactly explain.

Subin spent the rest of his class thinking about the playlist and the possible reasons why it exists. His first thought was maybe it was all just a joke, but that didn’t make any sense because how would Sejun know that Subin would lose his hoodie and have to borrow his. Also, that wouldn’t be a good joke and Subin thought that Sejun was funny, so he wouldn’t plan a bad joke like that.

His next thought was maybe Sejun had a secret crush on someone but never wanted anyone to know so he titled his secret love playlist with Subin’s name to hide the real identity of his crush. It could make sense. They were always together and a lot of people already thought they were dating. Anyone would believe Sejun’s secret crush was Subin.

 _Anyone would believe Sejun’s secret crush was Subin_. His mind kept coming back to that. Maybe Sejun did have a crush on him. But it didn’t make sense… _Why would he?_ They were just best friends. Best friends who cuddled together, shared clothes, and were almost never apart aside from classes. All perfectly normal best friend things. Best friends who anyone who didn’t know them well already thought they were dating. But they weren’t and Sejun would never like him that way. So why did that playlist exist. None of it made any sense to him.

* * *

Subin kept thinking about the playlist throughout his next class and even into his lunch with Chan during their shared mid-day break.

“Is that Sejun’s hoodie?”

“Yeah he let me borrow it this morning when I couldn’t find one of my own” Subin answered. The reminder that he was wearing something of Sejun’s and how quick Sejun was to get up and offer it to him, especially early in the morning, made him think about his current dilemma even more.

“Is everything alright?” Chan asked. “You seem a bit distracted is all”

Subin didn’t want to say anything because talking about it seemed so weird. It was just a playlist, and one that he shouldn’t have even seen. It shouldn’t be a big deal. But it was because it was Sejun and everything about Sejun was a big deal to Subin. He realized how much he wanted the playlist to truly be for him. He realized how much he wanted Sejun to have those feelings for him, because that’s how Subin felt about him. He realized how much he loved Sejun, and how much he wanted to be loved back. The realization that he loved Sejun should have been scary, but it just felt right. It made him feel more like himself.

Apparently his silence spoke for itself.

“Aww who hurt our Subinie?” Chan immediately switched to _time to baby Subin and protect him from any harm_ mode, which was a very common mode among their friend group.

“No one hurt me it’s just,” He didn’t know how to say it, so he just reached into his pocket for Sejun’s iPod and handed it to Chan. “That’s Sejun’s iPod. I found it in his pocket”

“Okay so what’s bad about an iPod nano, well besides the fact that he has an iPod nano”

“It’s not the iPod itself it’s what’s on it”

“What did he do?” Chan laughed. “Listen to Yummy by Justin Bieber on repeat?”

“Hey that’s a good song” Subin said in defense.

“No it’s not, but continue”

“Just,” Subin started, suddenly becoming nervous. “Look at his playlists”

Subin sat there while Chan looked through the playlists. He watched the other’s facial expression go from confusion to amusement.

“Oh so our Sejunie is in love with you!” Chan stated like it was the simplest conclusion in the world.

Subin put his head on the table and sighed dramatically in response.

“Wait, what’s so wrong with that?” Chan asked, genuinely confused. “Aren’t you in love with him too?”

“How did you know that?” Subin replied while lifting his head off the table.

“Dude, it was obvious”

“How? I didn’t even realize until like an hour ago”

“Just was,” Chan smiled. “Just like how him being in love with you was obvious too”

Subin sat back and thought about that. Was it obvious that Sejun loved him? Throughout their entire time as friends, Sejun always did whatever he could to make Subin happy. He was always there to listen to him or make him laugh when he needed it. He would wait to watch a new episode of a show with Subin, so they could cuddle too. Subin was the first person he would call when something good happened and the first person he would go to if something was wrong. He always babied Subin, well everyone did, but from Sejun it felt different. It didn’t feel like a friend teasing and babying their youngest friend it felt like… It felt like someone teasing and babying someone they loved. Because Sejun loved him. _Sejun loved him_.

Apparently, he had a look of realization on his face because Chan decided to speak up.

“So did you realize now?”

“Yeah,” Subin responded, still a little shocked by the realization. “What do I do now?”

“Confess?”

“No!” Subin said a bit too loud. “I can’t just do that”

“Why not?”

“What if everything ends up going wrong? What if I lose him, I can’t do that”

“You won’t lose him,” Chan reassured him. “Just think about it at least. If anything goes wrong, i’ll be here for you”

Subin nodded in response. “Thank you”

For the rest of lunch they talked about other topics until it was time for each to go to their next class. Subin tried to push thoughts of Sejun to the back of his mind during his last class. He wasn’t paying all this money to think about Sejun, although if he had to pay money just to be able to think about him he would highly consider it.

* * *

When he got back to his dorm later, Sejun wasn’t back yet since he had a late class that day. Subin decided to do his laundry to keep himself occupied, no surprise that his missing hoodie was there. Later, he decided to put his own hoodie on and leave Sejun’s on his chair. Out of sight out of mind? Or more like out of his immediate vicinity and off his body out of mind. Except Sejun wasn’t out of his mind. He tried to work on his literature assignment, but couldn’t focus. Everything was just Sejun Sejun Sejun.

Whenever Sejun had a late class, he would always bring back food for himself and Subin. He would ask Subin what he wanted. This time Subin couldn’t find it in himself to respond. He decided to shut off his phone and try to focus on his assignment, which ended up being a lost cause because his thoughts were still full of Sejun.

Later, he heard the door open and Sejun come in.

“Hey I brought food,” Sejun called as he walked in. “You didn’t answer so I just got some chicken from the place down the street that's your favorite”

“Sorry, I shut off my phone to focus on an assignment,” Subin said, taking the box of chicken. “Thank you”

“No problem” Sejun replied, with his cheeks already stuffed with food.

 _Cute._ Subin thought to himself and hoped he didn’t blush while thinking it.

Subin started to eat and the two talked about their days. Subin did a great job of not bringing up the iPod or playlist, because he didn’t want to make it awkward if Sejun wasn’t ready to make his feelings known. Except it was all that was on his mind, so he couldn’t help it when it slipped out.

“By the way”, Subin started. “You left your iPod in your hoodie pocket”

“Oh”

“Yeah I just left in there for you”

“Thank you” Sejun said quietly.

There was a kind of awkwardness in the air that the two had never had before. The room was silent except for the sound of them both eating. Subin didn’t know what to do, or if anything he could do would make the situation better or worse.

 _Okay Subin you started this now it’s time to fix it._ He thought to himself and got up to sit next to Sejun on his bed.

Sejun looked at him as he sat down and then looked away and continued to eat. Subin couldn’t look at him either. He realized he was completely unprepared for this. But there was no going back now.

“Hey,” Sejun looked up when Subin spoke and put the chicken that he was eating down to give him his attention.

Subin didn’t say anything else right away, the words suddenly getting stuck in his throat. But there was Sejun, looking at him and waiting for him to say something. Sejun who he loved deeply, for who knows how long. Maybe since the day they met. Maybe since the time Subin got homesick and cried and Sejun held him and said he would try to be a little bit of home for Subin so he wouldn’t have to be sad anymore. There was Sejun who he wanted to spend all of his time with. His best friend, the brightest part of his life. Sejun who was his whole world, and maybe even more. Maybe like the universe, his love for Sejun and Sejun’s importance in his life was always expanding. With all of this in mind, he worked up the courage to say it.

“I love you” Subin said and it felt like he had been waiting to say it his whole life. Like loving Sejun was always meant to be a part of his life, and he believed it was.

“I- Wait,” It took a second for Sejun to process what he said. “You do?”

“Of course” Subin smiled. “You attack my heart”

Sejun groaned and covered his face causing Subin to laugh.

“You listened to the playlist?” Sejun asked, still covering his face. “Oh my god that’s so embarrassing”

“No it was really cute,” Subin grabbed Sejun’s hands to uncover his face. “It made me realize how much I really love you too, and that I feel the same way for you”

“I love you so much,” Sejun said and Subin could feel he really meant it. He pulled Subin into his arms, in classic Sejun fashion. “I love you my baby Subinie”

“Shut up,” Subin replied faking annoyance. “I’m not a baby, if anything you’re the baby here”

“Okay whatever you say, baby” Subin tried to hide that the pet name made him blush. Sejun would later tell him that everytime he tried to hide it he failed.

Subin leaned more into Sejun’s arms. Being in Sejun’s arms just felt right, he had always thought that when they cuddled but now it was different. He was in the arms of someone he loved and someone who loved him in return. Nothing could feel better than this, Sejun felt like home, just like he told Subin he would be.

“So,” Sejun interrupted his thoughts. “Is this the part where I get to kiss you?”

Subin answered that by lifting his head and pressing his lips to Sejun’s. He immediately decided that kissing Sejun was at the same level as being in his arms. Subin felt cliche, but he really believed that his and Sejun’s lips fit perfectly together, like they were meant to be. He decided to stop thinking and just focus on Sejun’s lips on his.

Eventually, Sejun broke this kiss.

“I love you,” Sejun started. “I think I have since the day we met”

“I love you too,” Subin responded. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize”

“Hey if you hadn’t then we would never have gotten here. I never planned to confess, I didn’t think you would ever love me too”

“You’re a fool for that, I don’t think I could exist without loving you” Subin meant that wholeheartedly and Sejun knew that.

“This makes you my boyfriend now right?”

“Of course”

Sejun smiled and kissed him. Subin knew he would never get tired of kissing Sejun.

* * *

“You can hold my hand if you want by the way”

So, Sejun did.

“For more than just a day” Subin added, making Sejun groan in response.

“You’re never going to let that playlist go are you?”

“Never baby” Subin laughed and leaned in to kiss him.

**Author's Note:**

> this one goes out to the people who are horrible at endings fics club, the leader of which being me. anyway thanks for reading :) kudos + comments are appreciated although i am horrible at responding to comments but!!! yeah. also pay attention in your classes kids don't be like subin in this fic <3 oh and hmu on twt if u want @sejuniscute im annoying as hell tho


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